Updated: Feb 17
When the ship is going down, the majority are standing on the deck and listening to the orchestra play the last song (waiting to see what happens). Then, there is me. I’m not built that way. Being a mother and a Diné-being from the core out, I am gathering as much information as I can and determining if I build a boat or a ship or an arc, whilst keeping my children safe and secure, and communicating to only those that are close to God. The toils of my work are running the days together like a long satin ribbon, I don’t even realize the weekends are upon me and, me and my family just keeps plugging a long. My days are filled with holding the family on track, daily tasks, meal prep, running along side husband as he runs the plumbing contractor company, facelifting the floral shop, exercising and upgrading our health to combat any further viral/bacterial manifestations, nurturing the marriage, the romance and my own self care all in the name of fighting for Freedom and Liberty. Surviving in a socialistic pool has become ever more difficult. If I can’t do this, what good am I really? I will not quit so God help me.
The news is tremendously crazy now days and so are the connections on social media. I am reading and am convinced that we are all in the worst possible shape of our emotional health. Stress is screaming and we are watching so much happen that the hypocrisy of the times are so unbelievable. It is everywhere. The algorithms are in full range to attack every “key” word entered or said in efforts to block American God-fearing Patriotic voices. My mind wraps the lingo and dissects the instances we were each shut out of platforms.
Today, I am not interested in rants nor the ump-teenth rehashing of political frustrations, for when you over mix, you destroy the integrity of the item. Over mashing mashed potatoes is a sin in the culinary world, when the potato’s starches are reactivated and it becomes a sticky mess. Over whipping heavy cream surpasses the fluffy stage and returns back to a failed liquid. Over mixing fry bread dough activates the gluten so far that the dough turns to a retracting rubber band that shrinks a piece of flat dough into a hockey puck. I am not seeing anything amazing coming from the pissing and moaning of our reality. We need problem solvers…. Where are the solvers?
So, I have decided to attempt a new way of solving. My way of work. To speak the truth without party and see where I end up.
What if I show I am really just a simple, lovely AMERICAN. A Native American apple pie in the 5th inning of the world greatest game? We speak of unity, but, no one is showing the shaking of hands before the game nor after. No one is building a boat. A boat to save the family. Or, a ship to save our Country. Or, an Arc to save humanity. Unity is in commUNITY and I have come to accept, I am really missing my grandmother… even though she’s a democrat. She’s mad at me for being a Republican, but, who is going to explain the deep darkness (an impossible discussion to a Navajo elder). What if I just love her without a donkey nor an elephant in the room? What if, we just sit as two women, influential in every aspect. What if I just hold her hands and ignore the glares of the aunt. I wonder if we’d ever get to see how much we are alike. The bottom line, she disowned me and I accepted the branding of that time. Now, it’s my job to be the best I could ever imagine. The ship is going down and I am below deck, working and gathering...
I have created a studio. A simple lighted space for YouTube, the key light, the warm light, the focal light and the back light. Filming has shown to be an interesting ordeal for me, but, it will manifest an outcome. Grandma was the first Navajo woman to have a radio cooking show and a political show before I was born, so what do I have to adjust to (it's been done before)? Can I work the cracks of the maze of censorship? Can I fight cancel culture with food, family, teaching and goodness? Can I free myself of my thoughts and worries for the Country? I am not sure where this will take me, but, right now I really don’t mind the unknown. P.S. How do you like the wrinkled Apron? I was actively working when a blog suddenly struck. God bless and keep positive by holding the line.